Jesus Christ Shepherd of Judea! I thought I would throw up as we drove home. I was shaking so bad that the only thing keeping me together was the seatbelt and Eric’s soft words letting me know I was going to be okay. How did he know that? I think it was a little white lie that not even he believed. I was pretty sure I was having a mental breakdown of some sort.
“I hit him so hard,” I muttered, my mind replaying what I’d done to Bill. “You killed him,” I accused Eric… but I wasn’t sure why. Hadn’t I told Eric to kill Bill the night before? I was pretty sure I did.
“He’s not dead. I merely broke his ribcage. It will take a while for him to recover,” Eric explained, keeping his voice level. Something told me he was more than pleased. Oh, yeah… we were bonded now. He WAS more than pleased. I could feel it within me.
“I asked you if you would be all right coming with me and you said yes,” he tried to reason. Didn’t he know there was no reasoning with crazy people?
I nodded anyway and then lowered the window. I needed fresh air. The smell of blood was getting to me, and of course it was made the more pungent because of the fresh infusion of vampire blood I had in me. “I thought I’d be fine. I was wrong, okay? I’m sorry.”
Eric didn’t speak for a moment and I continued to take deep breaths of the fresh air blasting through the window. The lights on the highway came and went, making me dizzy, or so I thought. Maybe I was dizzy for a different reason. Bill’s words about me being a time traveler had hit me just as hard as what I’d done to him. I racked my brain trying to figure out how he had come to that conclusion until Eric interrupted my thoughts.
“You’ve been through too much in the past month or so. I think you need to rest,” is what he said.
“I don’t need to rest. I need to work,” I said adamant. If I stayed home I would be an even bigger wreck. I would be able to think. I didn’t want to be able to think.
“Obviously you don’t understand what I am telling you. This is not open for discussion or negotiation. You are on leave starting tonight and until I feel you are well enough to return to work. And you’re moving into my house.” Eric’s voice told me he meant business, not pleasure.
My first instinct was to fight him and throw a tantrum at not being able to control my own life. Then I remembered something very important. Last time I hadn’t heeded Eric’s wishes, everything had gone to hell in a hand basket. My last night in the year 2011, I’d spent it at his house because I had moved in. Why would I do something different now?
“You barely know me,” was my feeble attempt to make him see reason. I just didn’t have it in me to argue anymore. Why did everything have to be such a battle anyway? Was I weak for giving in? Or strong for letting go?
Then I got a horrible feeling of déjà vu, and this time it had nothing to do with time travel. I’d said those exact same words to Doctor Nino the night before. Nino really didn’t know me, nor did I know him. I’d still kissed him. I’d thought that I wanted to feel, but what I felt now was not what I’d had in mind. And besides, repeating the same phrase to two different people said something very sad about me: did anybody know me at all? For all my mind reading, I was the most closed person I knew. It had a little bit to do with the fact that I was a telepath and had to watch what I said out loud, but some of it stemmed from being lonely. I didn’t know how to talk to people. Correction: I didn’t know how to trust people.
Eric smiled and reached over to put his hand on my head. He caressed my hair softly and then pulled it (not too hard) to get my attention. “I know you.” And in fact he knew me better than many other people. We’d spent a long time talking this past month, and I’d opened up to him more than I thought I would. Ever. To anyone.
“I don’t have a lot of money,” I said, feeling the tears prickling my eyes for a bunch of different reasons. “If I don’t work I’ll have even less.” It had been the main problem for so long: lack of funds. The whole burden followed me like a stinky clingy dog.
“In two days you will have two hundred thousand dollars in your bank account. I expect that will carry you through your absence from work.”
I was flabbergasted. “B-but… that was a fine!”
“To be paid to me to use as I see fit. You could sue him and go through the motions. I figured a settlement would be in your best interest. Would you like more than what you’re getting? I will hire a lawyer for you. I know several.”
I shook my head. His high-handedness knew no bounds. However, in this case, I was willing to overlook it. Restitution. I was getting money owed for pain and suffering. The new American model. Leave it up to Eric to know all about it and make sure I profited from it. I had no argument left, I really didn’t. I had neither the desire nor the brain cells to form one.
We arrived at his house (my house? Our home?) in record time and Eric made sure we made a bee line for the bathroom. He preferred his bathroom downstairs, and I didn’t care as long as I wasn’t left alone. He ripped my clothes off and practically shoved me into the shower, following closely behind. This time he was naked when he joined me.
“We’re making a habit of this,” he observed, lathering up my hair with his shampoo. “Not that I mind, understand? I love it when you smell like me from head to toe.”
I was willing to try anything to forget the events of that night. I concentrated on Eric’s hands, the way they touched me. He was so strong, but so gentle with me. He was an amazing sexual partner, but he showed me his loving side too. I basked in that. I loved him. I’d fallen in love with him again.
The steam inside the shower wasn’t helping with the goose bumps all over my skin. Eric’s touch, even as warm as it was from the heat of the water, had the effect of making my skin erupt. My nipples tightened when my hair fell over them as Eric rinsed it. I couldn’t keep my eyes off him. I admired his body, tall, thick shoulders, slender hips, gracious plenty saluting my body with every intention of getting inside. My lady bits were tingling with anticipation. All the bad stuff lay forgotten along with our clothes. I didn’t want to think. I wanted to be selfish and let Eric do all the work. I wanted to take advantage of his body to help me forget.
We bathed quickly, my lust feeding his. He was holding back, trying to get us in bed, but we didn’t make it. As soon as we started getting dry he fell on me, literally. The bathroom floor became our bed, and the plush area rug in front of the shower provided no cushioning whatsoever. But when he lifted me and set me on the floor, I knew I wouldn’t stop him.
“I need you,” he said with a grunt, reaching between us almost desperate and plunging inside me. I lifted my legs and wrapped them over his waist, taking everything from him. I knotted my fingers in his hair as he kissed me, thrusting both tongue and manhood inside me, letting me become his vessel into which he poured and from which he drank.
I moaned my pleasure, feeling his hands all over me. He lifted me, kneeling with me wrapped around him. “Kiss me, Sookie.”
Oh, God! I wanted nothing more. I kissed his face and his neck, biting a little and making him growl in response. I took his hand and kissed his fingers and palm. I kissed his shoulders. He moved me over him, making sure I took all of him inside me, his eyes closing in bliss even though he liked to keep them open to look at me.
“You’re mine, Sookie,” he growled and moaned. When he fixed me with his eyes, not letting go of my gaze, I melted around him.
“Ykarr,” I said in Old Norse, the only word I knew how to say for sure. I was learning, though.
“Endr,” he commanded, his eyes blazing and drawing me in.
“Ykarr, Eric. Einn ykarr,” I gasped, my body shuddering and heralding something really good.
“Minn ástir,” he whispered. Then he repeated it more forcefully and kissed my mouth. I was thrown over the edge, feeling fireworks throughout my body and moaning over and over as Eric’s tongue swept inside my open mouth. His body convulsed under me as he threw his head back and came with a mighty cry. I felt him spilling inside me, his offering cooler than my body. I held on to his neck, feeling a little weaker than usual. Eric relaxed and put his head on my shoulder, hugging me close.
“Ek ann thér,” he whispered.
“What does that mean?” I asked, planting soft kisses on his shoulder.
“It means I love you, my darling Sookie.”
I choked at his words. Yes I’d heard them before in my other life, and I’d heard them last night, but something about needing to hear them again and often made me tear up. Besides, he was willing to say them even after finding out that I’d had Bill’s blood. The information had fazed him momentarily, but he understood and it hadn’t changed how he felt about me.
I hid my eyes from him. I would not cry, not again. “I love you too,” I said, feeling as he stood up with me still wrapped around him.
The cluviel dor looked as lifeless as it had when I’d found it again. It didn’t give me the warm fuzzies like it had when I’d first found it. It was just a tarnished old thing. Still, this tarnished old thing had given me the opportunity to alter the past at the expense of my sanity.
For some reason holding the small box rooted me. It was a link to the past which was now my future. I couldn’t say I missed any of it, but I was feeling a little lost. Each decision carried an immeasurable weight behind it. Exhibit A: Bill. Exhibit B: Sam. Not everything was bad, of course. Exhibit C: Eric. I just hoped I’d done the right thing by telling him as much as I had.
My room felt odd to me. Eric was sleeping in his day bedroom and I was in my new bedroom upstairs, sitting on my bed, holding the cluviel dor with nothing better to do and a whole empty day ahead. Eric had movers bring the contents of my house to his… minus the living room furniture and the spare bedrooms. I had all my cooking things, all my clothes, my brand new bed… it would still take a little while for me to get used to my brand new home. It felt lonely to be in the room; that was the problem. In essence, this would be “my” bedroom, and the bedroom downstairs would be “his” bedroom. We were roommates with perks.
I closed my eyes and shook my head at myself. That wasn’t right at all. We loved each other. We’d made love in my bedroom more often than in his, and the only reason he had given me my own room was because I didn’t like to spend the day downstairs, and he recognized that I needed a private space. I’d spent almost a whole week in his house already and he’d endeavored to make me feel like I belonged. It wasn’t easy for him to share his home with a human, so some things felt awkward. He was trying though, and I was trying to take it in stride.
For one, I felt safer. For another, the money from Bill had been transferred to my bank account, so I didn’t feel like I was mooching off Eric. I begged him to give me something to pay: rent, electricity, water, cable, anything! He refused, but seemed touched.
“Buy my True Blood when you go to the market,” he had said when I tried to have him give me a price for rent.
“Not nearly enough to cover rent,” I had argued.
“Are you always so argumentative?” he had asked and smiled widely, taking in my posture. I’d been standing in the kitchen, arms akimbo, dinner cooking behind me while he nursed a True Blood on the counter.
I’d looked down and pursed my lips. “Sometimes I’m worse,” I mumbled and turned around. Not a second passed and I’d felt his arms around my waist. I had relaxed against his body and had let him talk me into not paying him any rent.
My mind was divided on whether or not I should tell Eric about the cluviel dor. It would substantiate Bill’s accusation. Of course, Bill didn’t know that it was a one-time-use kind of deal. Bill also didn’t know the true purpose of the cluviel dor. I had yet to profit from it. I could, at that very moment, go to Vegas and bet the sudden windfall I’d gotten from Bill on the Yankees winning the World Series. I would clean the house and be booted out of Las Vegas faster than I could say “I won!” But I figured that was wrong and would bring me bad karma or something.
I didn’t want to keep the secret to myself any longer though. Every time I lied to Eric about being psychic I felt a pin in my heart. Worse than that now, because he could tell I was lying. He hadn’t said anything yet, but I knew he could tell. He was letting me come clean on my own. I had no doubt that he had played along with me in front of Bill, pretending Bill was the crazy one but knowing that there had been a sliver of truth in all of it.
I put the cluviel dor in the pocket of my jeans, making up my mind that I would come clean the moment Eric woke up for the night. We were supposed to have a date tonight. I would tell him all about it during dinner. Before dinner. As soon as he woke up. The moment he opened his eyes. I didn’t want to lie anymore. Not to Eric.
With my new resolution in place I was left considering what to do with myself for the rest of the day. I’d watched every movie and then some. I’d read every book and skipped the ones that made me fall asleep while reading. Not everything in Eric’s collection was to my taste, which is to be expected. We were two different people. I doubted he read romances and devoured mysteries like I did. I’d tried to delve into a history of the Middle Ages, only to fall asleep with the book on my chest. It was definitely not my kind of subject matter.
I did want to learn more about the Vikings, and there was a surprising lack of books about the subject in Eric’s house. Our house. I was starting to get used to that… That morning I decided to visit the nearest public library. After a quick search online I got directions and headed over.
The library in Broadmoor was… it looked like a school it was so large. I felt so small. The parking lot wasn’t busy, but it was extensive, and the building was a massive brick structure, with several book drops up front, and a large welcoming awning leading to the main doors. I passed the security sensors marveling at the size of the place, and I was immediately lost. I had to stand where I was for a minute and take it all in.
Near the door was the check-out desk, and ropes to make lines. Never in my life! Further inside I saw another desk and headed there directly. It would hopefully contain a person who could help me find what I was looking for. From that center desk radiated several chairs and seating spots, and from those the long stacks of books. I was sure that if I stared at them long enough, I would be able to make rhyme or reason of them. But I figured that Eric with his large home and many businesses paid enough in taxes for me to avail myself of the services of a librarian.
The lady behind the desk was more than helpful when I told her I what I was looking for. She actually had me follow her to the right section. The Dewey Decimal system wasn’t new to me, but in a library this large it was like finding needles in haystacks. The librarian was a little older than me, maybe, with a friendly smile and an urge to help. She’d been bored, I’d gathered that much. She showed me the section I was looking for and then assured me that my library card from Renard Parish could be used anywhere in the state of Louisiana.
She also pointed me in the direction of the fiction section. For later.
I gathered several books and chose a desk behind the stacks of books, instead of a seat in the main area. Everything was quiet and solemn, just like in a regular library. People’s thoughts were focused and easy to block out. And so I began my research into Eric’s roots.
“Excuse me,” said a woman’s voice from behind me. Instinctively I threw out my sixth sense, even knowing exactly who that voice belonged to. What was she doing here?
I turned within my seat to look, purely out of morbid curiosity. I froze instead of running, and stared. “You’re far away from home,” I said, thinking that it must have taken her almost two hours to get to Shreveport… unless she popped herself into the library.
Her dark eyes lit up with surprise, her black hair swinging about her shoulders in a shiny cascade. “Yes I am. So are you,” she said and tried to smile but failed. “I take it you know me.”
“Why don’t you tell me who you are, just in case I’m mistaken?” I said and stood up, grabbing my purse. I was getting ready to bolt, even though I knew it would be useless.
“I work here,” she said and watched almost horrified when I shook my head. I’d already seen her change clothes in the blink of an eye. She’d been following me and now she blended with the rest of the personnel inside the library.
“Your name is Claudine Crane. I don’t need protection. You have not seen me and you have not found me. You tell any of my family where I am and I swear I will sic a vampire on you,” I said, feeling not myself. Images of other fairies were starting to trickle into my awareness, and I didn’t want anything to do with any of them. Claudine opened her mouth and closed it again, staring at me in horror. “I’m sorry, Claudine. I know you mean well, I know. But you cannot tell them you’ve found me because Breandan will know I am Niall’s weak link. He will send the torturers after me.”
I turned and started walking out of the library. I didn’t want to hear any explanations. Claudine had pretended to work for Tara to get to me before, so her pretense now was nothing new to me. But her finding me so fast… that was new and scary. She wasn’t supposed to come into my life until January. It was only October.
“Hold on a second!” Claudine shouted when I was already in the parking lot. I wished I had some lemon spray or some iron… not to hurt her! Just to make her back off. I didn’t want to hurt her. I just wanted her away from me.
“I know where you live with your siblings, Claudine. I’m not kidding about that vampire,” I said over my shoulder. I’d seen her materialize inside my car, so she could certainly do so again. I was hoping she’d take my threat seriously.
“How do you know all this?” she asked. I could hear her huffing and puffing behind me, until finally she was walking next to me.
I stopped. “Niall sent you to take care of me, am I right?” She nodded, wide-eyed and looking pale. I continued. “He’s been fighting Breandan to control the fairy portals, am I right?” Another nod from Claudine. “I am Niall’s great-granddaughter, yes?”
“Yes, but how do you know? I felt fairy magic around you. Can’t you just tell me? Are you seeing the future?” she asked making her voice low.
“No, I’m not seeing it. I’ve lived it. Neave and Lochlan already got their hands on me once and I will NOT go through that again,” I said through clenched teeth. I started walking backwards to my car and she reached for me with pain in her eyes. “Do not dare touch me, Claudine Crane! You were supposed to save my life. You were supposed to protect me, but nobody came. Nobody came for me.”
Traitor tears started rolling down my cheeks and were echoed on Claudine’s. I knew I was hurting her, but I needed to take care of myself as well. “What can I do?” she asked finally, giving in to the fact that I wasn’t going to explain any more.
“Forget you found me. Look for someone else to help. Do not tell Niall of my whereabouts…”
“He already knows you’re with Northman,” she interrupted.
My heart sank into my stomach. I’d already been found. I turned and got in my car, sitting and staring at the dash, trying to get my brain back in gear so I could drive out of there and back home. Then I would run downstairs to Eric’s room and curl up against him for the rest of the day.
“Won’t you at least explain how you knew all this?” Claudine asked. She was sitting beside me, and actually that had been my fault. She took advantage of an unlocked door. Me and my bad habits from Bon Temps, where nobody locks their car doors unless there’s something interesting inside the car, like a CD player or change.
I looked up at Claudine who was dabbing her eyes with a tissue. There was no use hiding the cluviel dor anymore. It was spent. I was the keeper of the magic now, not the little snuff box. I retrieved it from my pants’ pocket and showed it to her. She didn’t react, which told me she had no clue what the box had once been.
“This used to be a cluviel dor fashioned by my grandfather and given to my grandmother,” I said and let it sink in. Claudine’s eyes filled with surprise then greed as she stretched her hand out to touch it. “You touch me I know vampires,” I said quickly, putting the box back in my pocket.
“I wasn’t going to touch it,” she said, sounding like a teenager.
“I don’t care. It’s spent but it’s still mine.”
“How did you use it?”
“I witnessed my husband about to be killed and I wished myself back in time, only I didn’t know what I was doing. I only wished to undo what had brought us to that moment so I could keep him alive,” I said, having a bit of a serendipitous moment. I wished to undo what had brought us to that moment. I was already working on that, and so were Eric and Pam.
“So you know the future?”
“More or less. It has changed now. I can only predict deaths for sure, and only into the next two years,” I said and grimaced, remembering Claudine’s death at the hands of Breandan. I closed my eyes and looked away.
“There is a rumor that you’re psychic, and another that you’re a time traveler. That’s why I had to come see you and keep you safe,” she explained.
Immediately my mind went to Bill. How had he known and who had he told? “Where’s the rumor coming from?”
“The vampire queen of Louisiana knows about it, and a friend told the Prince.”
“That would have been Mr. Cataliades. I could kill that demon for…” I shut up. If I ever saw Mr. Cataliades again I would tell him where he could put his telepathy.
“It was him! You know too much, Sookie,” she shook her head. “You’re not safe.”
“Tell me something I don’t know.”
“I’m serious. Do you still not want me to keep you safe?”
“I live with a vampire. What do you think?”
“I think yes,” she ventured a guess.
“I think no, and get out of my car.” My mind was made up. I would not be a victim. I would go home and do anything Eric wanted me to do so I could stay safe.
“I’m sorry, Sookie,” she said. A moment later I knew no more.
My first thought when I came to was “not again.” My second thought was that I was going to kill somebody and damn the consequences. My third thought was along the lines of asking Eric to turn me tout de suite so I could REALLY do some damage.
Thankfully this second abduction came without pain. As soon as I woke up I could open my eyes and sit up. I was in a bedroom, a nice one, on a bed with a flowery comforter. It was the fanciest place where I’d been held captive.
“Why do these things ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME!!!” I yelled at the top of my lungs. Someone knocked on the door and entered. It was Claudine. “Do you know that Eric is my blood bonded? You just got yourselves a war!”
“I had to do it. The Prince told me to,” she said, almost whining because she didn’t want to be in this position.
“Is kidnapping acceptable for your ‘becoming an angel’ thing?” I asked. My voice came out shrill.
She looked down and shook her head. “Can I bring you anything? Are you hungry or thirsty?”
I waited until she was looking at me to speak. “I would like a lemon meringue pie with lemonade. Did I ever tell you I killed a fairy with a trowel made of iron? If I ever get out of here I will ask Eric to turn me so I can drain you!”
To Claudine’s credit she remained and listened to my childish spiel. When she was sure I was done she lifted her gaze to mine again. Hers was full of worry and pain. She really didn’t like what she had been made to do. I felt sorry for her… briefly. I wondered if I was able to call Eric to me. Then again, it was still daytime.
“You’re on the second floor, so please don’t do anything foolish like try to climb down the window,” Claudine pleaded.
“It’s only for a little bit. Niall is on his way to talk to you then you’re free. Your vampire refused to let him see you,” she explained.
I frowned. Eric hadn’t told me that Niall had contacted him. I would be mad, except… goose, gander. We had been keeping things from each other. I was doing it and he was doing it too. Oh, well… it would get rectified tonight, provided I got out of here in time.
I heard footsteps coming up a set of stairs and immediately got up from the bed. Claudine was still at the door but retreated to let the newcomer in. It was Niall, in all his splendor, wearing a fine suit and a worried expression, not unlike Claudine’s. He came near with every intention of hugging and kissing me, but I closed my body down and he stopped dead in his tracks.
“I know you are mad, Sookie, but please let me explain who I am…” he began.
I interrupted. “You are Niall Brigant, Prince of the Sky Fairies and my great-grandfather. I’m sure Claudine already told you about the cluviel dor that Fintan gave to my grandmother and which I used to travel back in time to save my husband.” I was proud of myself. I loved Eric, and I was claiming him over and over as I should have from the moment I handed him that knife.
“She told me, yes. Who is your husband in the future?” he asked, curious. I thought it was obvious.
“He’s a vampire.”
“It hasn’t escaped my notice.”
“How did you get married?”
“We pledged to each other with a knife,” I said, leaving it kind of vague. I wish I’d known what I was doing at the time, although I wouldn’t have accepted.
“A vampire wedding ceremony,” he concluded for me.
“Does it matter if it binds us as partners? You know what? That’s neither here nor there because it hasn’t happened yet,” I said, making a motion with my hands, cutting the air.
Niall took a deep breath. I was so mad that I was talking to him like I never had before. He needed to understand though. I was mad at him about so many things.
“Your wish to know me led Breandan and his lackeys to me,” I began, speaking of things that had already happened to me, but not yet happened in the current time-space continuum. “I killed one fairy named Murry, and later Neave and Lochlan took me from my home to abuse and torture me. I was nearly dead when you finally found me, and the only thing that saved me was the massive amount of blood that my husband gave me. I ended up with scars all over my body and a terrible case of post-traumatic stress disorder. I still have nightmares. As for what you did to Dermot, that is inexcusable. You will find when you remove the curse that he is sorry.” I watched as Niall’s eyes widened in surprise. “He is your son, and he is a fine man.” Or, at least, he was to me. “He lived with me once the curse was removed, and was the only one who didn’t betray me or cause me grief.”
Niall narrowed his eyes. “Do you know how old I am, child?”
“Not older than my blood bonded. I need to get back to him because I’ve already been kidnapped once during this time, and I don’t care to put him through that again.”
“I understand that you are scared…”
“Wouldn’t you be? I have no powers against you, not even my telepathy. The only one who has EVER kept me safe is Eric.” That statement said out loud was more than I could bear. Eric was right: I’d been through too much in too short a time. I broke down and cried. “Please let me go and get home.” I wasn’t above begging, but Claudine walked to me and handed me my purse and keys.
I followed her down the stairs and through a hall before Niall stopped us. I knew it was too easy.
“How did you lift Dermot’s enchantment?” he asked, looking curious again. It was his fall-back expression.
I wiped my cheeks with the heel of my hand. I knew I had a tissue somewhere, but it was probably in the car. “Claude and I kissed him,” I answered.
“Can I see the cluviel dor?” he asked and stretched out his hand.
“It’s mine,” I said, not moving.
“I know. I would only like to see it,” he said in a slight patronizing tone, if you ask me.
I retrieved the small box from my pocket, but didn’t hand it over. “You can look at it while I hold it.”
Niall leaned close, his hair falling over his shoulders. He scrunched his nose like he couldn’t believe that such an ugly little thing had ever contained fairy magic.
“When I first found it, it was beautiful. The edges were gleaming and golden and the surface was marbleized green and smooth,” I said, pocketing it once more.
“Tell me what happened,” he said. We were standing in the living room to the triplets’ home. I’d been here once, maybe twice. I couldn’t remember.
I sighed. I hadn’t told the exact story to anyone and I had a feeling I would do it twice today. “The King of Louisiana, Nevada and Arkansas set a trap to kill Eric and take me as his telepath. I killed his second in command, but Eric took the blame. As the King was about to sink a stake through Eric’s heart I wished for none of it to have ever happened. Next thing I know I was standing on the same spot but two years into the past. I can remember everything, and I can change some things.”
Both Claudine and Niall had been listening intently. When they didn’t say anything for several moments I turned and left. I wasn’t going to spend any more time with the fairies.
“Sookie….” I heard my name whispered in my ear and it woke me up. I’d fallen asleep in Eric’s room waiting for him to wake up. “Oh…Sookie… your scent is delicious.”
Eric turned my body so that he was actually rubbing all of himself over me. His fangs had lengthened completely and he was going for my neck slowly. His hand found the hem of my shirt and snuck underneath, pulling my bra down and grabbing a breast. The problem: I was enjoying it a little too much and he was aroused by the scent of fairy that I had failed to wash off. I was the one with the most control at that moment.
“I spoke to Niall,” I said and Eric stopped his attentions immediately. Then he thought about it and continued.
“I will have you then you can tell me all about it,” he said, this time moving his hand down to my pants. He undid them quickly but, in his effort to take them off me as fast as possible, he ended up grabbing the cluviel dor instead. It popped out of my pocket and into his waiting hand. “What’s this?”
“It’s a cluviel dor,” I answered, watching his reaction. “It’s a spent cluviel dor,” I corrected quickly, seeing the same expression on his face as I had the first time I’d shown him the little box.
“How come you have a spent cluviel dor? Where did you get it?” Eric asked, sitting up and still holding it, examining it. There really was nothing to see.
“My grandfather made it and gave it to my grandmother. She kept it hidden until I found it. I used it, that’s how come it’s spent.”
“What did you use it for?” he asked, switching his blue eyes to me.
I sat up and set myself to rights quickly. We were having this conversation here and now. “I used it to save you. The night you were about to be killed by De Castro, I wished that none of it had happened.”
“Did I die?” he asked. He wasn’t afraid. I read a bit of anger, but no fear.
“I don’t know. I was transported two years into the past before I saw you die,” I said and my voice faltered. I could no longer look him in the eye. “I should have told you sooner, but I didn’t think you’d believe me.”
“You lied to me,” he said with a hint of pain in his voice.
He was right so I nodded.
“What else is a lie, Sookie? Can you really read minds?” I looked up to find he was mad at me. Livid was the correct word in this instance.
“Yes I can. I told you how that came about. I will tell you everything. I don’t want to lie to you.”
Eric got up suddenly and got dressed in the blink of an eye. “I knew there was something you weren’t telling me, but I never thought you were lying.” He started pacing. “You’re not a psychic. You know things because you’ve gone through everything already. That means that those fairies that attacked you isn’t something you’ve seen happen, but something you’ve gone through. What else do you know?”
“I’ve told you everything, but things keep changing. I wasn’t supposed to meet fairies until January, and my family found me today. The only thing that hasn’t changed is when people die.” I stood up too, feeling too small sitting on the bed.
“And Bill kidnapping you?”
“That took me by surprise. He thinks I can travel in time, but this was a one-time thing to save your life,” I explained.
“You did know me,” he muttered looking at me in a strange way that I couldn’t decipher. “What were we?”
I swallowed. “We were pledged. I was your wife.” My voice faltered. “I killed Victor Madden to save your whole area from him. He was a sadist. He didn’t want to approve Pam’s request to make a child of her lover who was dying of cancer. He tried to kill me and Pam. He was getting ready to kill you too.”
“How do I know you won’t lie to me again?” he asked, getting closer. He really hated that I had fooled him.
“Because you know me. I only did it because I thought you wouldn’t believe me. I can’t lie to you. It was eating me alive.” There was no reasoning with a mad Eric. He needed to calm down first.
“What did Bill do to you?” he asked, his voice low and dripping with venom.
I blinked. “What do you mean? You know what he did.”
“In the future, what did he do? Why did you hit him the way you did? Was it because of this kidnapping or was there more? Answer me, Sookie. I’m about to lose it here.”
A sob caught in my throat. It was going to kill him. My emotions and pain were already filtering through to him. I looked away and covered my mouth to stifle another sob. I didn’t want to be a victim, and I felt that if I said it out loud that was exactly what I would become. But he had to know, and he had asked.
“Sookie…” he said getting closer.
“His maker beat him mercilessly and I rescued him,” the words caught in my throat. “I became locked in a trunk with him…” That was it. I couldn’t finish.
“What happened?!” his voice was hot to the point that the whole room felt like it was on fire. I shook my head. He wanted me to say it. “Tell me!”
“He raped me!” I yelled at him then screamed and fell. All the hurt I’d been putting away and burying for years, all the trauma, the shame, all of it crashed on me. My body couldn’t handle it, and neither could my mind… and so it simply shut down.
Ykarr = Your(s)
Endr = Again
Einn = Alone (only)
Minn ástir = My love
Ek ann thér = I love you